Country route vs. city route

Driving a country route is just like driving a city route except there are more cows -- most of the time way off in a pasture, sometimes right in the middle of the road. The only other thing that's different between the two are the riders themselves. Country riders and city riders are as different as night and day -- so much so that a blind bus driver (and there are a lot of them out there, I guarantee!) could tell the difference.

When a bus full of city riders pass over a dead skunk, they scream and shout and hold their noses, some even pretending to faint dead away in the aisles. Country riders say, "What? I don't smell nothing!"

When a bus full of city riders see a deer out in the woods (not that they would, but let's just pretend), they scream and shout, "Look, there's a deer. It's Bambi. Isn't he beautiful?" Country riders take one look at the deer's rack, pull out pretend deer rifles and blow the buck to smithereens.

When a bus full of city riders see the bus hit a squirrel trying to cross the road, they scream and shout for the driver to be more careful next time because squirrels are so cute and huggable. Country riders beg the bus driver to stop so they can scoop up the remains because squirrels taste great in stew.

City riders are in a hurry to get home because they have TV, the internet, GameBoy and Nientendo waiting for them. Country riders are in no hurry because when they get home, they have to stack hay bales, feed the cows and walk the pig around the block before they can do their homework.

And finally, city riders think they can get away with anything because they believe the bus driver can’t do much about it. Country riders, on the other hand, tow the line because the driver lives just down the road, knows every parent by first name, and those same parents have given him permission to "do whatever it takes to make my child behave and I'll support you without question."

Thank God I'm a country boy!

1 comments:

The Bus Driver said...

omg this is sooo true.. we have both types in this town!

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